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They breed it - the emphasis on popularity. It made me cry, and I felt ashamed of being a woman. A socially spurned Orinda teenager was convicted of second-degree murder yesterday after a three-day trial that the judge said smacked of ''entertainment. The judge rejected the arguments of prosecutor John Oda that Protti - suffering from the rejection of her peers and the acute embarrassment of being labeled ''weird'' in fashionable Orinda - had acted with premeditation and ''wanton disregard for human life.

Both the judge and the attorney representing Protti, Assistant Public Defender Charles James, questioned whether the trial had served any useful purpose. Because Protti was being tried as a juvenile, Merrill heard the case without a jury. Under California law, Protti would have received the same sentence whether she was convicted of first-degree or second-degree murder. She will be placed in the custody of the California Youth Authority, which can release her at any time, but must free her when she turns It was disclosed on Tuesday that the Public Defender's Office had attempted five weeks ago to have Protti plead guilty to second-degree murder.

The offer was rejected by District Attorney Gary Yancey. Oda said that Kirsten's parents, Art and Berit Costas, supported his decision to try the case and seek a conviction for first-degree murder.

The last day of the brief but emotional trial revolved around the merits of a public juvenile proceeding that so obviously prolonged the agony of the defendant and her family.

Since her arrest last December after confessing, Protti has been comforted throughout her court appearances by her parents and her four sisters. The tears were torrential at the trial. There was keen interest in the case by residents of Orinda - mostly well-groomed mothers and daughters -who rushed the small courtroom for seats in the spectator's section.

As many as 40 were removed each day by the bailiff when they lined the walls, kneeled on the floor or sat on others' laps. There were frequent arguments over who was more deserving of a seat.

Most often, the parents won. Defense attorney James told the judge that ''Bernadette had said she feared nothing more than public humiliation, and that happened. There was really no purpose to have this trial. I think the quality of justice suffers. After the judge announced his verdict, James said: ''Perhaps it helped purge the melancholy surrounding this case. I'm not sure what went on for Bernadette is a healthy or good thing.

Prosecutor Oda, describing the case as ''pathetic,'' said it ''had to be brought out in the open. The Costases believed it was first-degree murder. They wanted it and you can't blame them. Art Costas had pushed hard for action when no suspect surfaced by the time Orinda's teenagers returned to Miramonte High School last fall. He warned that his daughter's killer might be among them - and he was right. I'm not thrilled or pleased.

The trial was good from the standpoint of hearing all the facts and evidence. We've lost our daughter. I don't think the punishment will ever match the crime in this case. Unanswered to the end was what provoked Protti to stab Costas to death after luring her to a bogus sorority initiation dinner.

Testimony established that Protti felt rejected. Costas, a cheerleader and varsity swimmer, became a symbol for her of the success and popularity she could not achieve. Oda said Protti was determined to kill Costas if Kirsten did not agree ''to be her friend and get her into the in-crowd.

He called Protti's confession to authorities ''self-serving'' and said that she was without remorse until she realized her arrest was imminent.

James countered that teenagers in Orinda may react more sensitively to slights because their parents' expectations for them are so high. Bernadette Protti had been charged with first-degree murder in the June 23 slaying of year-old Kirsten Costas.

Merrill, who heard the juvenile case without a jury, said prosecutors failed to prove first-degree murder beyond a reasonable doubt and ordered Protti to appear on April 1 for sentencing. After surrendering in December, Protti told police she resented Costas and attacked her because "I was afraid she was going to tell people I was weird.

There also was a suggestion that Protti was jealous of her more popular and successful classmate. Both girls had been invited to join the group. After the verdict, Art Costas, Kirsten's father, told reporters: "My feeling is that the law has been served.

I don't believe the punishment will ever match the crime. Bernadette Protti only wanted to ''hurt'' Kirsten Costas when she stabbed her to death last June, a tape recording of her confession disclosed yesterday. Protti reacted so violently because she was afraid her popular classmate in Orinda would tell their friends she was ''weird. Her taped confession was played to a crowded courtroom in Martinez, where she is on trial for murdering the Miramonte High School cheerleader.

I don't understand it. It was, like, if I had been thinking straight it would never have happened. Afterwards I was just so horrified and sick. Once on a ski trip, she claimed, Costas had made a comment about her skis that hurt her because her family couldn't afford ''nice'' skis. Like, looks or money or popularity or things. The year-old suspect surrendered last December to FBI agent Ronald Hilley, ending a baffling six-month investigation.

Hilley prefaced the girl's confession by testifying that Protti had begun to feel rejected as a sophomore. Costas, a varsity swimmer and cheerleader, ''had been somewhat symbolic of the rejection,'' he said.

The two teenagers were members of the same service organization but they were not friends. She picked up Costas on the excuse that they were going to an initiation dinner for members of the service club. Protti said Costas had learned from friends that there wasn't going to be a dinner. Instead, Protti invited her to a party. The two drove to the parking lot of a church in Moraga.

Well, not really argued. She put me down. When she failed to reach her parents by phone, Alex Arnold drove her home. Protti followed in her car at a short distance. Costas' parents were away attending a potluck dinner for their son. Before Kirsten could seek refuge in a neighbor's home, she was stabbed five times.

Throughout the rambling confession, Protti repeated often that she could not explain her conduct. She was telling me to go away. I just got angry and I did it. She said she drove home immediately, ''flushed the marijuana down the toilet and washed off the knife. It was not until the next morning that she heard her classmate was dead. Extensive testimony focused yesterday on the murder weapon, which is believed to be a wooden-handled kitchen knife with a blade at least 12 inches long.

Protti said she had ''noticed'' a knife in the car during her drive with Costas. The trial resumes at 10 a. On the surface, the differences between Bernadette Protti and Kirsten Costas were superficial.

They both lived in a well-to-do area of Northern California outside Berkeley, were good students and athletes at Miramonte High School and active in their communities. Eventually, this instability would cause her to lash out at the person she felt responsible for her failures. As their sophomore school year ended, the girls both tried out for the varsity cheerleading squad.

Kirsten made it; Bernadette did not. I was having fun anyway, and she made some comment about them. The remark by the girl whose wealthy father was able to provide his only daughter with the best equipment stung Bernadette and provides some insight into how her mind was working.

The girl told Berit Costas that Kirsten was invited to a secret Bob-o-Links initiation dinner the next night. When Kirsten returned home the next day, she was told of the dinner and made plans to attend. Berit Costas told her daughter to enjoy herself at the dinner and to remember to turn on the porch light. The Costases would never see Kirsten alive again. Around the same time, Raymond Protti drove his daughter to a house near their home where Bernadette said she had a babysitting job.

She asked him to leave the car, an orange Ford Pinto, in front of the house because she would feel safer. Raymond Protti agreed and walked the yards back to his home.

In fact, they had been invited to an unsupervised party. Regardless, Kirsten accepted a ride home after she could not contact her parents. On the way home, the man noticed that a light-colored Pinto appeared to be following them.

Kirsten assured him that it was no big deal. He watched her cross the lawn. While doing this, he caught a glimpse of a female figure pass by his car in pursuit of Kirsten. I tried to hold her hand and pray a little on the side. The Costas family returned home shortly after the attack only to find their normally quiet street abuzz with police and an ambulance.

They saw Kirsten being loaded into the ambulance and they followed it to a nearby hospital. The popular cheerleader, however, was mortally wounded and died at p. Not far away and an hour before Kirsten died, Bernadette arrived home and took a nice walk with her mother. Nothing seemed amiss. To police it was very real and they began a massive investigation of the tragedy. To police she was a likely suspect, but to her friends she was seemingly incapable of such a violent, blitz-type attack.

There are two types of profiling according to noted criminologist Brent Turvey, who labels them inductive and deductive profiling. An Inductive Criminal Profile is one that is generalized to an individual criminal from initial behavioral and demographic characteristics shared by other criminals who have been studied in the past. It is the product of incomplete, statistical analysis and generalization very often without comparison to norms , hence the descriptor Inductive.

Bernadette was brought in for more questioning and agreed to a polygraph exam. She failed parts of it, while other parts were inconclusive. Police still lacked sufficient evidence and Bernadette returned home. Her conscience began to weigh heavily on her and she put her thoughts down in her journal:. I want to go to heaven when I die. I regret what I did. If I kill myself, I will hurt people even more my family. She considered whether to commit suicide but her religious upbringing prevented this.

On December 10, , before school, Bernadette penned a note to her mother and father that clearly shows the anguish she was feeling. Bernadette left the note where her mother would find it after she left. And he is right. Please still love me. Bernadette P. It took police six months to determine that Protti was the killer. Stacy walks off and finds her own way home, but later when she reaches her house Angela makes one last attempt, begging Stacy to be her friend.

Stacy refuses and mocks and insults Angela. Angela, in a fit of rage, stabs Stacy to death with a knife. At the Costas home, Arnold, sitting in his car, saw Protti attack Costas. He thought that he was seeing a fist fight, but in fact Protti stabbed Costas five times with a butcher knife and fled.

One thing is for certain, Bernadette has not had any serious run-ins with the law since her release from prison. Bernadette Protti killed cheerleader Kirsten Costas in and served time in prison for her stabbing death. Where is Bernadette Protti now? The rest—five sisters and one brother—are all several years ahead of her and were born in San Francisco County.

One sister is two years apart. The oldest sister is ten to eleven years her senior. The following timeline was compiled by Traciy Curry-Reyes over a ten-year period. The research comes from public records, court records, news archives, stories told to her, and her personal notes. Thursday, June 21, Kirsten Costas is away at cheerleading camp.

Her mother, Berit Costas, answers the phone at 10 p. She speaks to a female teenager, who claims to be a member of the Bob-O-Links. The young lady invites Kirsten to dinner. Berit takes the message and relays it to her daughter.



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